


Dating the Grand Highblood

by FailureArtist



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Black Comedy, Fluff, Gorn, Hermaphroditic Trolls (Homestuck), Other, in that order
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-22
Updated: 2017-05-22
Packaged: 2018-11-03 19:15:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10973634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FailureArtist/pseuds/FailureArtist
Summary: Be careful what you ask the Grand Highblood.





	Dating the Grand Highblood

The first thing that surprised you about the Grand Highblood asking you out on a date is that he _asked_ you. You'd have thought when he was interested in someone, he would order them, not ask. The second thing is he asked you on a _date_. A romantic date, not just bending you over his throne. And finally, you were surprised he asked _you_ on a date. Here he was, the second-in-command of the Empire and a sexy beast, asking a nobody like you out. Yet he said if you wanted to say no, you could. Of course, you said yes.

Your first date was to a fashionable restaurant, one which you could never get a reservation. You dined in his private block. Though the food was exquisite, your food organ was too tied in knots to eat much. The Grand Highblood ate enough for both of you. During your meal, he asked you questions about your life and seemed intrigued by the answers, even though his life was vastly more interested. He told you to call him Kurloz though you kept slipping up and calling him Grand Highblood. At the end of dinner, you expected him to put the couch and the ice container in action, but he never made the moves on you. You were too shy to make the moves on him. He asked you out on a second date and you said yes.

On the second date, he took you to a carnival. He held your hand with his large hand and led you around. He said he was happy being seen with someone as cute as you, though you felt you had the greater honor. At the games, he won you lots of stuffed lusii though you suspect the carnies let him win. When you went on the thrill rides, he screamed the loudest. You ended the night at the Tunnel of Flushed. He asked permission to kiss you and you said yes. It was your first kiss and it was so gentle, almost chaste. As you left the carnival, he asked if you if you wanted to spend the weekend at his beach hive. Again, you said yes.

His beach hive was quite quint and cozy for someone of his stature, though it was colorful. It was located in an isolated cove he owned so you had privacy. He still wore his paint so he couldn't swim. You did all the swimming for him. Together, you took long walks and collected sea shells. He spoke rapaciously about nature. After such a talk, he turned to you and asked if you wanted to be matesprits. He said you could say no but there was only one answer you could give.

Not long after that, he led you to his private recreation block. You were unsheathed even before he opened the door. When he did, you were surprised to find there were no torture implements or anything kinky. He took off his paint for the first time and though you had been worried he was ugly under it like many clowns it turned out his clean face was perfect. Then he took off his clothes and he was more than perfect. Every muscle was developed and defined. You felt outclassed. He undressed you so tenderly and he was pleased by what he saw. He admired your bone bulge even though his was much bigger in girth and length. After kissing down your body, he put his mouth on your nook and with his long tongue, one that was the size of some bulges, he pleasured you. You came embarrassingly fast. Luckily, you were so worked up by consummating your attraction you soon unsheathed again while you returned the favor. He wanted you to top him so you did. His nook was on the spacious side but he acted as if you were filling him to the brim. His enthusiasm made you come yet again.

As you cuddled on the platform, you felt disappointed. Sure, you'd had two orgasms, but this wasn't what you had expected when you fervently self-pailed. It was altogether too vanilla and gentle. He hadn't even left any hickies. His bone bulge was as big as you imagined, but you hadn't gotten the chance to use it. Your nook desired it so much it could implode. Though you had been intimidated by the Grand Highblood before, now you felt you could talk. You told him you wanted him to top you.

“Are you motherfucking JOKING?” he asked.

You said you weren't.

“I can't do THAT.”

You asked why not.

He gestured at his large sheath. “My motherfucking BONE BULGE is the size of your arm.”

You insisted you wanted to at least try. You wanted to see if you could take all his strength.

He snorted. “You? YOU CAN'T TAKE MY STRENGTH.”

You said it was unfair sinners got to take him and not you.

“Look, I brutalize motherfuckers for a living. CAN'T I GET A BREAK? Besides, my nook is MUCH MORE SENSITIVE than this thing.”

In response, you started coaxing his bone bulge out of his sheath. He was right about the size but that wasn't deterring you. You begged him again. He seemed to be breaking down.

With his eyes screwed shut in pleasure, he said, “Fine, my sweet bitch. I'LL FUCK YOU LIKE AN ANIMAL.”

Just him saying that in his deep tone made you unsheathe. You didn't need preparation.

He flipped you on your back and set you on your knees. You let him treat you like a ragdoll. He grabbed your thighs and sunk his claws into them so hard you're sure they drew blood. You could feel his arm-sized bulge along your ass.

“Ready?” he asked.

You moaned yes.

The tip of his bone bulge entered you easily with how wet you were. He put it in more so slowly it made you whine in impatience. It stretched you out farther and farther as it went along and filled up every available space. You felt oh so full and oh so satisfied. Then you felt the tip reach your gene bladder. It was an odd sensation, a little painful but not too much. It was only when you felt the bulge double-back on itself you realized you had bitten off more than you could chew. The bone bulge was nowhere near done penetrating. It didn't seem possible the bulge could make more space but it seemed to have muscles to spare. Your moans stopped and now you couldn't stop screaming. Blood-colored tears came down your checks and you were sure your nook was bleeding your color. You were tearing like paper.

Finally, you felt his hips against your ass but that was only the beginning. He pounded into you like an animal. His claws sunk deeper into your thighs. Then like a meowbeast he bite your shoulder so hard he took out a chunk. He used your horns as handles only to break them with a sickening crunch. He grabbed your arms and wrenched them out of their sockets like you were toy. You could barely keep conscious from the immense stabbing and throbbing pain everywhere in your body. Your throat was too sore to scream anymore, not that screaming helped. He was in some sort of demonic highblood trance. Then he put his enormous hands around neck AND –

The last thing your soul heard before it left the mortal plane was, “Damn. NOT ANOTHER ONE.”

 

 


End file.
